24 December 2015

WE HAVE A WINNER!!!!!!!



Yes, fans,  

WE HAVE A WINNER!!!!!!!

Before we go to the entire Sappy Christmas Song of 2015, let’s recap the game.

It was looking like a repeat for the old pro, the Closer, that Galveston Bay Gal, our own QG, throwing scorching 100+ MPH fast balls.  But, sadly, she was disqualified on the best grounds of all:  Her final verses were declared to be “Non-Sappy!”  Yes, sports fans, it really is all about that Blaze of Glory—He of fire unquenchable and unending streams of life-giving water.  Nothing sappy about that!

So, QG gets the “Reason For The Season” Award, which ranks way above the Sappy Christmas Song Award; I checked and that’s where the awards go according to the ribbon chart in the PX uniform shop, right, RC?

Rookie of the Year goes to Robin; she also gets the “Dear Kitten” ribbon (shredded).  Ava’s assistant judges, Gideon, Uggie, Gracie, Jimmy, Jasper (Jazz) and Cleopatra were adamant in this regard.  Larry Bird and Beaulero were just content to grab a little more alfalfa and go with the flow.

Drum roll, please………..

This year’s winner of the Sappisimus Cum Louder Award is Reformed Catholic—for conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity, at the risk of life, limb, and Christmas dinner for including in his award-winning stanza a toss of the head to those who practice Rev Mrs RC’s noble profession.  Explain it to the Session, you must.

Finally, I claim the Tomorrow is a Better Day Certificate for showing up, playing my mandated one inning, and doing it all at the last minute!  I’ll start sooner next year, Lord willin’ and the cricks don’ rise.

Aaaaaaaand NOW!  The moment you've all been waiting for---The Sappiest Christmas Song of 2015.  Take it away, Arlo……

THE WORST NOEL
By a truly demented group I am proud to call friends!

The worst “No El” the announcer did say
Was to shoppers and tourists on Christmas Eve day.
On Christmas Eve day, their lists now complete.
As homeward they struggled, for cookies to eat.
"No El! No El! No El! No El!
Subways are closing, we’re running no El."

(Mac)

In a subway car stranded down in the ground
A motley group of people were found.
A lawyer, a soldier and a stock trader
With a preacher, a teacher and a young hooker.
"No El!, No El! No El! No El!"
Subways are closing, we're running no El."
(Jodi Harrington, aka, QG)

No cell phone service, the lawyer did cry,
The trader then fumed that no stocks he could buy.
They both commiserated each others position,
That neither could speak with their office's admin.
No El, No El, No El, No EL!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!

The Preacher got up, who's with me he said,
I'm exiting the car, gotta get me a sled.
My daughter's expecting it under the tree,
so I'm leaving this place, come on, come with me.

No El, No El, No El, No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!
(Reformed Catholic)

The young hooker's name was Anna Marie
Her dress was so skimpy her tats you could see
She shivered in the cold which the soldier did see
And he gave her his scarf to cover her knees.
No El! No El! No El! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!

" We must get out of here", they all agreed
The soldier kicked down the door so all were freed.
Finding the subway exit in the dark
Would certainly not be a lark.
No El! No El! No El ! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running no El!
(QG)

Down the street, in a house, the cats did not care.
Their antics had left the tree all but bare.
They decided to climb up the chimney with glee,
When they peered out the top, a strange crew they did see:
No El! No El! No El ! No El!
Subways are closing, they're running no El!
(Robin)

The lawyer did use his phone then that night,
the flashlight app did work and give them light.
They walked along the track, "will it end" someone wailed,
"It will end for you, stay away from the third rail".
No El! No El! No El! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!

"Emergency Door", shown the light on the wall.
They opened the hatch to get out one and all.
On a street they did not know, but holiday lit,
With a bunch of little kitties, on a chimney they sit.
No El! No El! No El! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!
All the houses save one, had their holiday theme,
One was Santa's workshop, that one a Frozen meme.
Colored lights, candy canes, reindeer and a sleigh,
but not one had a stable where Jesus lay.
No El! No El! No El! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!

As they walked along the lane, a wee house they did see,
Somewhat shabby and lost, not a light or a tree.
Yet a creche was setup, shepherds, camels and things,
but the manger was empty, someone took the young King!
No El! No El! No El! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!
(RC)

The light of the lawyer's phone led their searching
For the missing Baby, Jesus the King.
Anna Marie searched under a wreath
And found the Baby hidden underneath!
No El ! No El! No El!! No El!
Subways are closing, we're running No El!

As the darkness of night turned into daylight
Led by the preacher, awed by this sight,
Hand in hand, the group began to sing
And their happy chorus around the wee house did ring:
Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel
Our King has come, who needs an El?


(QC)

2 comments:

Reformed Catholic said...

Bravo ... and yes, that ribbon goes above the Sappy Song Award ...

However a comment .... while the ending verses were not sappy, they were the happy ending that most sappy songs have .. :)

Jody Harrington said...

I'm humbled to claim "The Reason For the Season" ribbon! Thank you, Mac! Although I tried, for some reason this year my Sappy Muse deserted me at the end of the song. I'm thinking the Holy Spirit intervened.... Merry Christmas, Mac and Ava and Robin and Neil!